December 14, 2006
Iranian Satirist Responds to Iranian President's Letter To The American
People: Mr Ahmadinejad! With All The Problems Facing Your Country, You Are Not
Even In A Position To Advise Other People
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Prominent Iranian satirist Ebrahim Nabavi is a known critic of Iranian
President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, as well as of members of the Iranian religious
establishment.(1) Last week, following Ahmadinejad's November 29, 2006 letter
to the American people, he took aim at him again, in an open letter posted on
the reformist online daily Rooz. In it, he responded to Ahmadinejad's letter,
point by point.
The following are excerpts from Nabavi's letter, in the original English.(2)
"Why Do You Do Things that Make the World Believe That a Simpleton is Iran's
"Dear Mr. Ahmadinejad, President of the Islamic Republic of Iran:
"If there were no history, and the letter you wrote to the American people
would not have been recorded in it, and the American people would not have
wondered how a person like you, with that rhetoric and discourse, is the
president of an ancient and historic country like Iran, perhaps it would not
have been necessary to respond to your letter. I read your letter, Mr.
Ahmadinejad! Stop it. Why do you do things that make the world believe that a
simpleton is Iran's president?
"Mr. Ahmadinejad! The world is bigger than these games; much bigger. I know
that you, wherever you go, have tried to be at the center of every picture and
interview, and will say anything to have your name repeated. But in a world in
which people are amused by alien beings and talking octopuses and driving
frogs for only one or two hours, these games do not last long. The game is
nearing its end. Please stop."
"Who Gives you the Right to Consider Yourself the Representative of Iranians,
But to Deny That Bush Represents the Americans?"
"The words that you use in your letter to the American people are appropriate
for the Iranian ministry of foreign affairs. If you think that you can play
with the Americans or Iranians or any other people through such empty and
repetitive words you are wrong. America itself is a place for games. They have
Hollywood. They create an Ahmadinejad in the morning and destroy him at night
at the end of the story. For these and every other people such games continue
only until you bury your head under the snow and think that others cannot see
"I ask you: When you were writing a letter to George W. Bush, one could say
that a president has written a letter to another president. But what is the
meaning of writing a letter to the Americans as a representative of the
Iranian people? Are you the representative of the Iranian people? Why and
since when did it dawn on you that you represent Iranians? Where is your
resemblance to the Iranian people? You are no better a representative of
Iranians that Bush is of Americans. I think that both nations are ashamed of
having such presidents.
"For this reason I ask you not to speak as the representative of Iranians.
Neither did you get any more votes in your rigged elections nor do you enjoy a
greater popularity in Iran than Bush does in America. Who gives you the right
to consider yourself to be the representative of Iranians but to deny that
Bush represents the Americans?"
"How Dare You Speak [in Your Letter] of Defending Human Ideals - in a Country
Where the Rights of Women, Ethnic Groups, Religious Minorities and the General
Public are Constantly Under Attack...?"
"In your letter to the American people, you wrote, 'Both our nations are
God-fearing, truth-loving and justice-seeking, and both seek dignity, respect
and perfection. Both greatly value and readily embrace the promotion of human
ideals such as compassion, empathy, respect for the rights of human beings,
securing justice and equity, and defending the innocent and the weak against
oppressors and bullies.'
"Mr. Ahmadinejad! A great number of the words you used are empty and
meaningless.... The Iranian people are not God-fearing, truth-loving and
justice-seeking, because if they were, you would not have been their
"Are you serious? Or you are playing with us? You support human ideals? Do
people like journalists even have any human rights in Iran? How can you call
yourself a defender of human ideals when your political faction shut down 150
publications in the past four years? How dare you speak of defending human
ideals in a country where the rights of women, ethnic groups, religious
minorities and the general public are constantly under attack, and where women
do not even have the right to gather in defense of their rights?"
"You Write... 'We, Like You, Are Aggrieved by the Ever-Worsening Pain and
Misery of The Palestinian People'... If the People of Palestine Are Homeless
it is Because [of] Iran, Syria And Hizbullah"
"You write in your letter, 'We, like you, are aggrieved by the ever-worsening
pain and misery of the Palestinian people. Persistent aggressions by the
Zionists are making life more and more difficult for the rightful owners of
the land of Palestine.'
"Mr. Ahmadinejad! The Palestinians are not the only people who are under
aggression in the world. And the people of America and Iran should naturally
be the last people to worry about the Palestinian problem. Why should the
Americans worry about the Palestinian people when the Palestinians' own Arab
brethren do not worry about them? If the Palestinians are under pressure, it
is because a terrorist group called Hizbullah is using Iran's financial and
military support to wreak havoc in the region. The people of Palestine are
aware that the only way they can survive is to live alongside Israel. If the
people of Palestine are homeless it is because Iran, Syria and Hizbullah are
the ones who have disrupted the peace process in the past two years."
"You [Tell the American People] 'I Consider it Extremely Unlikely That you...
Consent to the Billions... From Your Treasury for [the Iraq War] - [But] do
you Really Think That the Iranian People Consent to the Millions... That you
Take From Their Treasury [for] Every... Terrorist on Earth?"
"You tell the American people, 'I consider it extremely unlikely that you, the
American people, consent to the billions of dollars of annual expenditure from
your treasury for this military misadventure.' Do you really think that the
Iranian people consent to the millions of dollars that you take out of their
treasury to help Hizbullah in Lebanon, Hamas, the Supreme Council for the
Islamic Revolution in Iraq, the Al-Dawa Party, Syria's Baath Party, the
Palestinian Liberation Organization and every other terrorist on earth? At
least in America it is evident who does what. In Iran this much is not known
"People [in the U.S.] Can Refuse to Vote for an Administration That Acts
Against Their Public Opinion... But What Can the Poor Iranians Do When They
Are Not Satisfied With an Administration?"
"In your letter, you referenced the recent elections in America [saying],
'Undoubtedly, the American people are not satisfied with this behavior and
they showed their discontent in the recent elections. I hope that in the wake
of the mid-term elections, the administration of President Bush will have
heard and will heed the message of the American people.' What you say is
correct. The United States is a country in which people can refuse to vote for
an administration that acts against their public opinion. In recent elections
too the American people voted for the Democrats because they were not
satisfied with Bush's performance.
"But what can the poor Iranian people do when they are not satisfied with an
administration? Does the Guardian Council allow the people to send their true
representatives to public office? Do dissidents even have the right to voice
their opinion in Iran? Why preach something that you do not practice?
"Mr. Ahmadinejad! With all the problems facing your country, you are not even
in a position to advise other people. As an Iranian writer who is embarrassed
of having you as his president, while apologizing to the American people for
your credulous letter, I call on you to be silent and not belittle our people
anymore with such letters."
(1) MEMRI Special Dispatch No. 1175, "Following Ahmadinejad's Letter to Bush,
Iranian Satirist Writes to Ahmadinejad," May 26, 2006,
Dispatch No. 1159, "Iranian Satirist Skewers Ahmadinejad," May 8, 2006,
Dispatch No. 1041, "Iranian Clerics Invite Fidel Castro to Convert To Islam;
Iranian Satirists React," December 7, 2006,
(2) Rooz http://www.roozonline.com/english/archives/2006/12/000832.php,
December 12, 2006.
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